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Van Helsing Movie

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  • Van Helsing Movie

    Although it isn't out yet,
    I must say that it looks rather bad.

    It's a good example of how I would
    not want a movie to look.
    \"Bush\'s army of barmy bigots is the worst thing that\'s happened to the US in some years...\"
    Michael Moorcock - 3am Magazine Interview

  • #2
    Well, forget about the Dracula characters for a moment and consider how this character looks and feels like Solomon Kane from a distance. Of course, I would a thousand times have preferred a Solomon Kane movie - now this piece of tripe will probably prevent that from ever happening. This movie will bomb and when someone raises the Solomon Kane thing no one in Hollywood will touch it because this movie sucked so much.

    Plus, WTF is this? Van Helsing meets Tomb Raider? Has anyone else noticed the preposterously modern feel of the female protagonist?

    I put my money on "Master and Commander" this weekend since it released to DVD. I liked it even though it felt slightly sketchy. But for High Seas - High Adventure - Eye Candy, it rocked. That guy Paul Bettany might actually be good for everyone's favorite albino. Certainly he can act. I just worry that he's too old already. IMDB claims his age is currently 33. His IMDB pics are persuasive too, he's very fair.

    Okay, finished my pudding - bedways is rightways now.

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    • #3
      I agree with your observation Krunky. Howard's Solomon Kane character must have been pitched to producers at some stage. When I first saw the trailer for this film I thought 'Oh great a Solomon Kane movie, wow!' (albeit given the Hollywood CGI treatment) Until of course the title Von Helsing flashed up. Von Helsing I guess is a wider known and therefore more marketable name, although I can't see Bram's original Helsing getting up to this kind of stuff. Will it prove to be slick, flash but ultimately shallow I wonder.

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      • #4
        Re: Van Helsing Movie

        Originally posted by Jerico
        Although it isn't out yet,
        I must say that it looks rather bad.

        It's a good example of how I would
        not want a movie to look.
        I simply cannot express in the Queen's English how much I agree with you on this one. I've seen the trailer at least five times now, and there isn't a single atom in my body that responded positively to it. I know you could probably say the same of th set design for some of my favourite films, but it just seems as if they've set the entire thing in a tiny black box. There's no sense of... it looks like the cinematic equivalent of a Twinkie (not a single natural or wholesome ingredient).

        I know that charge could be levelled at a lot of films, some of which I quite like, but never before in my life have I seen a trailer that took so many things I consider cool and made them look so utterly unappealing. I'm actually more likely to go and see Scooby Doo 2. I doubt the Blade team are too worried at this point either.

        D...
        "That which does not kill us, makes us stranger." - Trevor Goodchild

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        • #5
          Ill go see it just cause it's a Universal film,
          not that it will have a bearing on Elric but.......

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          • #6
            Originally posted by DeeCrowSeer
            ...it looks like the cinematic equivalent of a Twinkie...
            :lol: Nice analogy, D. Let's hope it doesn't have as long of a shelf-life!
            "Wounds are all I'm made of. Did I hear you say that this is victory?"
            --Michael Moorcock, Veteran of the Psychic Wars

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            • #7
              Guest may have it right.

              Why not we all check it out, we might at least have a good nap.

              We want Universal to keep thinking fantasy is a good idea.

              :)
              \"Bush\'s army of barmy bigots is the worst thing that\'s happened to the US in some years...\"
              Michael Moorcock - 3am Magazine Interview

              Comment


              • #8
                It does look to be rather terrible. It will be another brainless monster movie. I probably will go see it, just the same. First, because it's Universal, as Guest pointed out above; second, it has Kate Beckinsale (I can't pass her up); and lastely, um...it has Kate Beckinsale?

                For some reason it reminds of this old movies from 80's call The Monster Squad, or something like that...its about a bunch of kids who have to fight all the classic movie monsters. Here: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0093560/plotsummary
                "In omnibus requiem quaesivi, et nusquam inveni nisi in angulo cum libro"
                --Thomas a Kempis

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                • #9
                  Well I'm going to give it the benefit of the doubt and shall be in the queue when it comes out here. For the CGI, the monsters and the Kate!

                  Be interested to hear what everyone thinks when they've seen it.

                  Might be an ok pulp movie

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                  • #10
                    I have the feeling that any cheesy-ness in it will actually play off itself and add to the overall effect...much like the same makers did with "The Mummy." I think it will be much the same...if you go expecting something dark, romantic, and horrific; you'll be disapointed. But once you realise that it is an adventure movie more than a monstor movie I think it could grow on you. I guess I'll find out soon...a friend and I may go see it tonight.
                    "In omnibus requiem quaesivi, et nusquam inveni nisi in angulo cum libro"
                    --Thomas a Kempis

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                    • #11
                      Last night I was very pleased to find that Universal are backing a film of the cancelled TV series Firefly by Buffy creator Joss Wheedon. This is a (imho) great little series that Fox dropped in favour of a 'reality TV' show. If Universal continue this trend of backing the work of people like Joss and Mike then I'm all for them.

                      Everking, here is a list of films that they say inspired Van Helsing, although I can see where you're coming from with the Monster Squad parallel, and, with Krunky, I hold that Solomon Kane is also probably another undeclared or at least subconscious inspiration: http://www.monsterlegacy.com/

                      I've read only a small sample of about five reviews so far but even the downbeat ones comment on how visually impressive this film is. Watch the trailer here (hopefully in full quality if your internet connection is fast enough, otherwise it's a bit slow to load): http://www.vanhelsing.net/

                      From a personal perspective I'd be well impressed if the Elric movie combines visuals like this with the combined plot of Elric of Melnibone and Dreaming City.

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                      • #12
                        I saw the movie today.
                        I cannot tell you how BAD it is visually.
                        I can't tell you how immensely HORRIBLE it is.
                        If you see it, you've been warned!
                        \"Bush\'s army of barmy bigots is the worst thing that\'s happened to the US in some years...\"
                        Michael Moorcock - 3am Magazine Interview

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Everking got it right when he said if you
                          expect horror in Van H, you'll be disappointed.
                          It is a fantasy movie generated by the "mass appeal"
                          formula of movie making; the PG-13 rating belies this.
                          I'd say key influences for the story are video
                          games like Castlevania and the anime classic, Vampire Hunter D.
                          I dare say that the screenwriter probably doesn't
                          know what Solomon Kane is.
                          \"Bush\'s army of barmy bigots is the worst thing that\'s happened to the US in some years...\"
                          Michael Moorcock - 3am Magazine Interview

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            I spoke to a movie fan friend of mine who saw it today Jerico and his feedback supported pretty much exactly what you (and Everking) have stated re mass appeal, Vampire Hunter D, and non-horror status. His summary was it was cheesy, but still entertaining if you don't expect too much of it and judge it on its own merits. On the whole he enjoyed it and did think the visuals were cool. The fact they got a Van Helsing themed fun park ride, figurines, and pc game ready before the film even came out pretty much proves the mass appeal theory. Or is that just par for the course with pre-arranged blockbusters these days?

                            I guess it's time for me to go see it and form my own opinion.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              [u]***MINOUR SPOILERS***[/i]
                              you've been warned.



                              Well, I saw it friday and it was exactly as I expected. Impressive but still mildly cheesy CG, very Vampire Hunter D-esque. Maybe I'm too much traditional but I was really annoyed by how much they changed the entire premise of Abraham Van Helsing...in fact, in the movie he's not even Abraham, but Gabriel...as in the archangel. And it's just not that he shares the name with the archangel...no...instead they make allusions to the fact that he IS the archangel Gabriel!!! I knew that they were going to change the character to make him more of an adventurer/monster-hunter...but this guy just kills kills kills...he has not even the slightest bit of scientist or iventigator in him.

                              In all, I'd give it a whopping 1.5 stars out of five.
                              "In omnibus requiem quaesivi, et nusquam inveni nisi in angulo cum libro"
                              --Thomas a Kempis

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