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"Night of the Crabs" by Guy N Smith

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  • "Night of the Crabs" by Guy N Smith

    If anyone wants a laugh try Night of the Crabs by Guy N Smith. Quite possibly one of the worst horror novels ever written. Giant crabs attack the cornish coast and only pipesmoking paleontologist Cliff Davenport can stop them. In the words on one reviewer:

    Night of the Crabs is perhaps one of the finest books I have ever read and I have read a lot. Everthing you could possibly want is here in under 150 pages. Murder, mutations, crabs and Cornwall is here. The sex scene alone bought me to tears.

    You will feel cheaper but happier for reading this book.
    http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/044...books&v=glance
    Batman: It's a low neighborhood, full of rumpots. They're used to curious sights, which they attribute to alcoholic delusions.

    Robin: Gosh, drink is sure a filthy thing, isn't it? I'd rather be dead than unable to trust my own eyes!

  • #2
    The Night of the Crabs is an unsurpassed masterpiece
    Really? And five stars as well. I wonder if all I've been missing all my life is a book about giant mutant crabs attacking the shores of Cornwall. A bargain at only $45.99. :)

    Have you read this one yourself devilchicken?

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    • #3
      Originally posted by spaced_moorcock
      A bargain at only $45.99. :)
      8O

      That's just taking the piss. Anyone willing to pay that kind of money for a book that is a charity shop regular deserves to be ripped off.

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Typhoid_Mary
        That's just taking the piss.
        And so was I. :)

        It does make you wonder who would be willing to part with their hard-earned cash for it, let alone pay that kind of asking price. :?

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        • #5
          I actually had a copy that I picked up from a charity shop in the UK a few years ago. There's actually about a half dozen or so books in the series.

          Mr Guy N Smith is an atrocious writer - but one of those rare treats where its 'so bad its good'
          Batman: It's a low neighborhood, full of rumpots. They're used to curious sights, which they attribute to alcoholic delusions.

          Robin: Gosh, drink is sure a filthy thing, isn't it? I'd rather be dead than unable to trust my own eyes!

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          • #6
            Originally posted by devilchicken
            There's actually about a half dozen or so books in the series.
            When not writing about crabs, he is stedily working his way through other species of 'scary creatures', e.g. locust and alligators.

            I'm looking forward to the point when he has gone through all the obvious ones and churns out something like 'Revenge of the Woodlice'...

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            • #7
              I had a "Night of the Crabs" once. :oops: Not recommended. :(
              \"...an ape reft of his tail, and grown rusty at climbing, who yet feels himself to be a symbol and the frail representative of Omnipotence in a place that is not home.\" James Branch Cabell

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              • #8
                Just checked on Amazon. You can pick up a copy now for the bargain price of آ£0.20. If only you could get free postage on it, I might be tempted... :)

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                • #9
                  I would prescribe a heavy dosing of Kwellada Lotion ,by cropduster.
                  (Dont tell mom lest you wanna sleep in the basement with the dog "again")

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                  • #10
                    I actually found this book on the ground last week. I am about halfway through it. It is glorious.

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                    • #11
                      Cliff Davenport is a glorious character - the Sherlock Holmes of marine biology!
                      Batman: It's a low neighborhood, full of rumpots. They're used to curious sights, which they attribute to alcoholic delusions.

                      Robin: Gosh, drink is sure a filthy thing, isn't it? I'd rather be dead than unable to trust my own eyes!

                      Comment

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